wow i didn't realize we were moving into the psychoanalysis portion of this conversation so what's your excuse? apart from being dead that's just cheating
I have witnessed the actual apocalypse. I'd be worried if it didn't break my mind in at least a few pieces. It's much easier when you accept it. Anatole was right all along.
[Much easier. The drugs help. A lot.]
And Ecks, Ecks was in pieces to start with. Now what's your excuse, human?
i was raised by wolves in a family of nine children mommy was a hard workin' woman but daddy went out and drank his life away we never had enough money we had to eat the family dog to survive good old skipper the girl i loved ran off with one of them city men with shiny cars and eyes that never stay still i was trapped in a snowstorm in college and had to eat my best friend's toes we never recovered from that then i found out i had cancer then i found out my new dog had cancer my wife left me my husband left me after her they said they just weren't comfortable with polygamy and married each other instead of me and the red sox still haven't won a world series
[Yet another chuckle. He sounds genuinely amused. Look at the funny human try to play a funny game...]
Ah, doctor, if you knew the kind of people - they're not really people - for argument's sake, the things I've had to move among, what they do just as a matter of course, to us and to each other... very few of my kind are only as bad as we've had to become to survive. But you are just an ass.
doesn't really count when you're still unliving, dude you started out as the same guy when you woke up all corpse-y that guy was willing to become what you are
i've seen lots of movies read books played dnd you guys are basically all the same in any incarnation with minor variations so you've either got a beast inside your head telling you to go eat people or you don't need one if you've got the beast sucks to be you, buddy (pun intended) but you're still letting yourself be ruled by what basically amounts to your id if you're doing it on your own then you're still responsible for everything you've ever done and i'm gonna guess with a guy like you it wasn't that hard to move among the "things" adapt because that's what we do to survive we adapt this isn't evolution you fangs lock yourself in stasis anything happening is just adaptations of who you were and who you are you don't get to use "oh, i became a vampire" as an excuse
Ohh. I know this game. [He relaxes a little again. The smirk is back in his voice.] This is where I get psychoanalysed, assigned the - what's the word - archetype? Trope? Maybe typecast... vampire typecast of your choice, and you can go back to being your miserable self, secure in the knowledge that no one ever changes, so you don't have to.
[He clicks his tongue. Such disapproval.]
Not that the experience of dying and returning to realise that your whole understanding of the essentials of reality is wrong could possibly transform a man. We can't have that.
nope you can typecast yourself, igor and believe what you want to believe but from what i've observed you can change you mind you can change your outlook you can change your situation you can get older, more tired, worn down you can find someone that makes you feel alive when she smiles but people don't change they just become more of what they are
so you were some guy who wanted immortality or maybe you weren't you got it now you've got eternity to come to grips with it your personality hasn't changed you just let some of the parts you pushed away before grow nothing about you that matters has changed
you're still some sarcastic asshole you still rely on your intelligence and you're still going to analyze the situation with the tools you've always used first
Yes, yes, I'm sure that's all true within your little human understanding of your little human world. Where you are lord and master among all the other little humans because you're so much smarter in your petty little terms. Big fish, such a tiny pond...
[It's a good mental image. He snickers over it for a bit.]
You are wrong on every single count. About me, about my kind... about the world. But you're still in your little pond, brought over wholesale. It's funny watching you flop in there. Careful you don't flop out of it. I've seen much stronger minds broken by it.
[Oh, well, this is easier to deal with. He's had people call him insane, narrow-minded, cowardly, and arrogant before. It's nothing particularly new, especially in that sneering tone.]
Now you're not funny anymore. Shouldn't you be offering some pithy remark about how you still aren't convinced that this isn't all some grand delusion of mine?
protip 2: not all of us break the same way you did
[That's the last response Beckett will receive. This conversation isn't going anywhere, and House isn't particularly interested in discussing precisely how he's broken. Beckett doesn't know him well enough to know that while he's always been suicidal, House has never actively tried to follow through. He's done stupid crap that might kill him. But never things he knows for certain will.
One life, one chance. That's how it's supposed to be. He's already explained that death is what gives life meaning. He's broken, and he's not repeating himself there.]
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rubikscomplex) wrote2015-08-27 10:05 am
no subject
i didn't realize we were moving into the psychoanalysis portion of this conversation
so what's your excuse?
apart from being dead
that's just cheating
no subject
[Much easier. The drugs help. A lot.]
And Ecks, Ecks was in pieces to start with. Now what's your excuse, human?
no subject
real talk, batdog
i was raised by wolves
in a family of nine children
mommy was a hard workin' woman
but daddy went out and drank his life away
we never had enough money
we had to eat the family dog to survive
good old skipper
the girl i loved ran off with one of them city men with shiny cars and eyes that never stay still
i was trapped in a snowstorm in college and had to eat my best friend's toes
we never recovered from that
then i found out i had cancer
then i found out my new dog had cancer
my wife left me
my husband left me after her
they said they just weren't comfortable with polygamy
and married each other instead of me
and the red sox still haven't won a world series
that's my excuse
no subject
[A chuckle follows. It is nasty.]
You are a funny man, House. Sometimes I do wonder why we fight so much. Then I remember you’re also an ass.
no subject
well, i was thinking about going into stand-up comedy
but then the leg happened
sit-down comedians are way less cool
also
takes an ass to know an ass
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Ah, doctor, if you knew the kind of people - they're not really people - for argument's sake, the things I've had to move among, what they do just as a matter of course, to us and to each other... very few of my kind are only as bad as we've had to become to survive. But you are just an ass.
no subject
so you were a saint when you were human
got it
no subject
no subject
you started out as the same guy when you woke up all corpse-y
that guy was willing to become what you are
no subject
Right. Yes. I'd forgotten that you were the expert on all things Kindred. Did you see a movie about it?
no subject
read books
played dnd
you guys are basically all the same in any incarnation with minor variations
so you've either got a beast inside your head telling you to go eat people
or you don't need one
if you've got the beast
sucks to be you, buddy
(pun intended)
but you're still letting yourself be ruled by what basically amounts to your id
if you're doing it on your own
then you're still responsible for everything you've ever done
and i'm gonna guess with a guy like you
it wasn't that hard to move among the "things"
adapt
because that's what we do to survive
we adapt
this isn't evolution
you fangs lock yourself in stasis
anything happening is just adaptations of who you were and who you are
you don't get to use "oh, i became a vampire" as an excuse
no subject
[He clicks his tongue. Such disapproval.]
Not that the experience of dying and returning to realise that your whole understanding of the essentials of reality is wrong could possibly transform a man. We can't have that.
no subject
you can typecast yourself, igor
and believe what you want to believe
but from what i've observed
you can change you mind
you can change your outlook
you can change your situation
you can get older, more tired, worn down
you can find someone that makes you feel alive when she smiles
but people don't change
they just become more of what they are
so you were some guy who wanted immortality
or maybe you weren't
you got it
now you've got eternity to come to grips with it
your personality hasn't changed
you just let some of the parts you pushed away before grow
nothing about you that matters has changed
you're still some sarcastic asshole
you still rely on your intelligence
and you're still going to analyze the situation with the tools you've always used first
no subject
[It's a good mental image. He snickers over it for a bit.]
You are wrong on every single count. About me, about my kind... about the world. But you're still in your little pond, brought over wholesale. It's funny watching you flop in there. Careful you don't flop out of it. I've seen much stronger minds broken by it.
no subject
k
no subject
cw: suicidal ideations
were you here for entertainment?
protip 1: i'm not your wind-up doll, asshole
protip 2: not all of us break the same way you did
[That's the last response Beckett will receive. This conversation isn't going anywhere, and House isn't particularly interested in discussing precisely how he's broken. Beckett doesn't know him well enough to know that while he's always been suicidal, House has never actively tried to follow through. He's done stupid crap that might kill him. But never things he knows for certain will.
One life, one chance. That's how it's supposed to be. He's already explained that death is what gives life meaning. He's broken, and he's not repeating himself there.]