Though he suspects that House would still get punched, on general principle, he looks ready to argue the idea of Arthur as eye-candy. The man doesn't do it for him, unless one counted 'immediately engage need to squabble'.
"I think I mean exactly who I said," Will remarked, blatantly ignoring House's attempt to be difficult. He was here to drink and apologize. The former he could do while arguing but to manage the latter he needed to avoid the bait.
House makes note of that sour expression when he mentions Arthur. Well, the guy's a dick and so is Will. Sometimes dicks work together, other times... Dicks will be dicks.
"I'm just a lowly pharmacy tech. Don't count on me for anything, boss." The lowest of the low. "Oh, but hey, check it, talking of Pierson, I got him to show me how to do pants with a long piece of cloth. If you're ever sick of the breeze down under feel."
Will's expression said all that needed to be said about the 'lowly pharmacy tech' shtick, but he didn't chase any further down that particular rabbit hole.
Instead, he did look intrigued by the idea of actual 'pants' or even just a pair of shorts to wear under the tunic folds.
"Does it involve needlework, or is it more folding with strategically placed knots?"
"Definitely folding. In my room, there's a cloth on the bed. Go grab it. And try to block out the spidey senses while you're doing it. I don't need you knowing where all my hidey holes are." He makes a shooing motion to Will. If the other man wants to see, he'll help fetch.
House has his brace on and decides to take that off for this demonstration.
"Not my fault you already advertised where they are," Will muttered with a small roll of his eyes as he set his empty cup down and got to his feet. However, the amount of time it takes him to return with the cloth suggests he was a good boy and didn't go snooping.
Re-taking his seat, he held the cloth out towards House.
"Nothing in his house is clean." He smirks at the other man. But really, it's clean enough. House stands up and takes the cloth. "There're a couple other items you wanna get to make them more likely stay on, but the basics..."
He lifts up his tunica and wraps the thing around him, making a skirt out of it. Next, he reaches between his legs to pull the back up to the front. From here, there's more tucking and adjusting. The process takes about a minute and a half before he's got some Bedouin-inspired pants going. "You can tie here, here and here to keep 'em up. And a thin belt keeps this part from falling back down when you need to run or ride a horse. Fibula can go here and here to keep it all anchored, too. Fibula being the Roman version of a safety pin."
Making a face, and surreptitiously wiping his hand on his tunic, Will watched the display. It was not unlike how he had taken to tying his subligaculum, just with a larger piece of cloth and a few more adjustments.
Still, he struggled a bit when the final product fluttered around House's legs. He understood the style, especially coming from Pierson, but he couldn't help his next comment.
"The 80s were an extremely underappreciated decade." His young adult years were in the 80s! "Pac-Man was released. The first Rubik's cube. Lennon was murdered. E.T. MS-DOS. "Thriller" came out. The Beirut embassy bombing. I will figure out a parody for "We Didn't Start the Fire," Graham Cracker. Don't test me."
You have been warned, Will!
House sits back down and takes up his cup again, leaving the pants in place. "They're more comfortable with my brace, at least. And I never liked wearing skirts, personally."
"You mean you haven't figured out a parody for "We Didn't Start the Fire"?" Will raised his eyebrows in an innocent expression. "Slacker."
He knows this is like waving a red flag in front of a bull, but he's curious to see how far House goes with it.
"As long as I don't ever have to make another walk from the courtyard to my room, in the nude, I'll take the clothing I can get." Don't tell me about the group bath/swim session to come. Allow him his little fantasies of modesty.
He knows he's being baited. It's so hard not to rise to it when it's itching under his skin. The urge is particularly strong when he's got quite a bit of liquor in him.
"Find me a guitar. Or the closest equivalent. I'll serenade you with my rendition version of it an hour after you get that in my hands." If he can get a musical instrument out of this, House is all for this challenge.
"When was the last time you stripped down naked in the courtyard, though? And how did I miss that?" Who does he have to kill to get someone to invent a video camera well before its time?
Will snorted softly, as once again House managed to twist a dare into a win/win scenario for himself. Though the ex-profiler was beginning to feel intrigued enough to wonder what might happen if they were able to get a musical instrument into the doctor's hands.
He'd have to decide if the potential reward was worth jumping through the man's hoops.
Decisions, decisions.
For the time being, he snorted and reached for his glass.
"I haven't. Not since we originally arrived in that state. A record I intend to continue to maintain."
House's special talent is twisting bets and dares into win/win scenarios. It's why a solid majority of the hospital won't play his games.
"You realize that's asking for someone to find a reason to strip you naked in the courtyard, right?" Some mysterious person who shall remain unnamed. "Tempting the Fates, bro. I hear they're real assholes."
"I think such an endeavor would result in disappointment for all involved," House behave. No one wants to see Will Graham naked and Will Graham doesn't want to be naked in front of others. Let's find some other chain to jerk.
"And the Fates are women, so that would be a different expletive, but as insulting them usually results in painful consequences, I'll let you have the last word there."
He's been behaving! More or less. It's so boring being a good boy.
House looks up at the ceiling and raises his cup. "Bring it on, girls. My mom and dad didn't gimme the middle name 'danger' not to live up to it. What kinda son would that be?" At least he lives up to his first name, being watchful and alert most of the time.
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"I think I mean exactly who I said," Will remarked, blatantly ignoring House's attempt to be difficult. He was here to drink and apologize. The former he could do while arguing but to manage the latter he needed to avoid the bait.
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"I'm just a lowly pharmacy tech. Don't count on me for anything, boss." The lowest of the low. "Oh, but hey, check it, talking of Pierson, I got him to show me how to do pants with a long piece of cloth. If you're ever sick of the breeze down under feel."
no subject
Instead, he did look intrigued by the idea of actual 'pants' or even just a pair of shorts to wear under the tunic folds.
"Does it involve needlework, or is it more folding with strategically placed knots?"
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House has his brace on and decides to take that off for this demonstration.
no subject
Re-taking his seat, he held the cloth out towards House.
"I'm assuming this is at least, clean."
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He lifts up his tunica and wraps the thing around him, making a skirt out of it. Next, he reaches between his legs to pull the back up to the front. From here, there's more tucking and adjusting. The process takes about a minute and a half before he's got some Bedouin-inspired pants going. "You can tie here, here and here to keep 'em up. And a thin belt keeps this part from falling back down when you need to run or ride a horse. Fibula can go here and here to keep it all anchored, too. Fibula being the Roman version of a safety pin."
no subject
Still, he struggled a bit when the final product fluttered around House's legs. He understood the style, especially coming from Pierson, but he couldn't help his next comment.
"I'm having a flashback to the eighties."
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"The 80s were an extremely underappreciated decade." His young adult years were in the 80s! "Pac-Man was released. The first Rubik's cube. Lennon was murdered. E.T. MS-DOS. "Thriller" came out. The Beirut embassy bombing. I will figure out a parody for "We Didn't Start the Fire," Graham Cracker. Don't test me."
You have been warned, Will!
House sits back down and takes up his cup again, leaving the pants in place. "They're more comfortable with my brace, at least. And I never liked wearing skirts, personally."
no subject
He knows this is like waving a red flag in front of a bull, but he's curious to see how far House goes with it.
"As long as I don't ever have to make another walk from the courtyard to my room, in the nude, I'll take the clothing I can get." Don't tell me about the group bath/swim session to come. Allow him his little fantasies of modesty.
no subject
"Find me a guitar. Or the closest equivalent. I'll serenade you with my rendition version of it an hour after you get that in my hands." If he can get a musical instrument out of this, House is all for this challenge.
"When was the last time you stripped down naked in the courtyard, though? And how did I miss that?" Who does he have to kill to get someone to invent a video camera well before its time?
no subject
He'd have to decide if the potential reward was worth jumping through the man's hoops.
Decisions, decisions.
For the time being, he snorted and reached for his glass.
"I haven't. Not since we originally arrived in that state. A record I intend to continue to maintain."
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"You realize that's asking for someone to find a reason to strip you naked in the courtyard, right?" Some mysterious person who shall remain unnamed. "Tempting the Fates, bro. I hear they're real assholes."
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"I think such an endeavor would result in disappointment for all involved," House behave. No one wants to see Will Graham naked and Will Graham doesn't want to be naked in front of others. Let's find some other chain to jerk.
"And the Fates are women, so that would be a different expletive, but as insulting them usually results in painful consequences, I'll let you have the last word there."
no subject
House looks up at the ceiling and raises his cup. "Bring it on, girls. My mom and dad didn't gimme the middle name 'danger' not to live up to it. What kinda son would that be?" At least he lives up to his first name, being watchful and alert most of the time.